Mathophobia

How I know that I a mathophobe is by waited until the very end to take any math class. I wanted to put it to off for as long as I could and when they said okay it is time for that math class, I said Oh Boy... I guess if i have to. Another reason I know I am a mathophobe is because on the first day of class we took a quiz called "Are You a mathophobe?" It had several different questions like the first one was my first. It said "when I said you would be taking a math quiz now, you: A. took a deep breath and will just do the best you can. B. tenses up- math is a 4 letter word but you'll try C. panic- you know you won't get anything right. When I heard the word test or quiz I get so nervous because I am afraid that I will not know the material and get a bad grade. I have always tried very hard in school, but when it comes to math, I just do not like it. I feel like if I was better at it then maybe I may like it. However, I am not good at it so that is the main reason why I am not a fan. Even though I do not like math very much, once I am a teacher I do not want to be one of those teachers who change your whole outlook on a subject just because they have a bad attitude towards it. I have had teachers who focus on other subjects, trying to avoid math. As students we did the same thing because we learn what we see. If we see our teacher not liking math then why should we. Your elementary years are where mathophobe can begin. That is where it started for me. I had a great kindergarten and first grade teacher, after that it went downhill. Their teaching was not fun and they made math boring and not “cool”. There was a point where only the smart kids were good at math, and everyone else was just normal. Today I am such a mathophobe because I want to teach first or second grade and not go any higher because then the math is becoming too much. Not saying that it is hard in elementary school, but just the thought of it makes me unhappy. My current job right now, I work at a jewelry store where math is done at every sale. Whatever the price is we always have to take a certain percentage off depending on the piece. My boss is always getting mad at me because I always have to use a calculator and take too long to figure it out. He jokes and says did you always do bad in math during school, and I respond saying YES it was one of my worst subjects because I do not like it and I still am not good and therefore still do not like it. Hopefully one day that will change, but before it does I think I have to get good at it first!